Proving the Point
by fiesa
Summary: She wanted to hurt him, she wanted her words to sting, because she didn't want to drag him down all the way she already had gone. It didn't seem fair. OneShot


_This one started out with the title and somehow went on a rampage in the middle part... But the end was exactly as I anticipated it!^^_

_I hope you enjoy reading it. It´s a bit long - which, personally, I don´t mind, and features a totally different atmosphere than the last two of my Fringe fan fictions. If there are oddities or curious scenes, I remind that Olivia is drunk - and if there´s anything else which seems ooc or au, I can just apologize beforehand^^ But it shouldn´t be too bad._

_Spoilers: none_

_Disclaimer: Nope. No copyrightin**Fringe**ment intended. I don´t own Fringe... if I did, there surely wouldn´t be a summer break or something like that! Though, German TV finally started broadcasting the second season... Yeah!_

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Proving the Point

„You know", Olivia said thoughtfully and leaned back as far as possible on her bar stool. "Life sucks."

It was a Friday evening in the last days of summer. The sun was still clinging to the sky, unwilling to let darkness swallow her world, and the last summer heat lingered over Boston like a blanket. It engulfed humans, animals and plants alike, behaving like an unruly child: Not wanting to let go of something and crushing the precious toys in the process. Like a huge glass dome, it displayed a clear, blue and endless sky which still made her want to be able to fly. Soaring up, flying among the little flock of birds she could barely see because they were so high up… Being able to leave behind the sorrow and the heaviness of being human was what she still wished for, even after so many years of living. Being free. What a wonderful dream.

Peter emptied his glass of scotch in one long drain and placed it back unto the counter before turning to his partner.

"And you´ve only now realized it?" He chuckled good-humouredly. "Really, Liv, you just had a bad day. It´s not the end of the world."

She glared at him angrily, not wanting him to feel good because she didn´t feel good, either. She´d agreed to come to a bar after work because she felt she had to try to relax a little bit. She felt stiff and sore after another week of chasing the Pattern listlessly, after giving it everything she had once again and not being able to beat it to the finishing line – once again. This pattern – what a joke – had been repeating itself for more than five years, growing stronger, becoming weaker, growing stronger again. Sometimes, she had thought she was able to untangle the webs of secrets behind it. Every time she thought she was close, she lost the tracks again. It still seemed as unreachable as when she first started to investigate with Fringe Division.

"No, it´s not, but it might be your end", she mumbled. As always, he didn´t have to try to understand what she was mumbling. He chuckled again.

"Loosen up. It´s Friday evening. We just closed the case. We deserve to enjoy our free-time, don´t we?"

"Free time?" She snorted. "I haven´t had a day off since last summer. Even at Christmas, we were working, remember?"

"I remember you went to spend Christmas with Rachel and Ella and left me to Walter, where I had to listen to ancient Christmas songs and had to eat some burned meal he claimed was stew."

His eyes sparkled mischievously. "And at midnight, you came over and fell asleep on our couch."

Olivia felt her cheeks flush at him mentioning her last, overly stupid escapade.

"I just thought you could need some company."

"And you finished our supply of wine."

"I didn´t!"

"I had to stop Walter from purchasing a whole shipload of Italian red wine. He was terribly stubborn about it."

"That was last year."

Peter shrugged. "I´m just saying you don´t have to be so stiff every day, Liv. Just because we haven´t got a clue as what will happen and what it is William Bell wants you to do, you don´t have to stop…" He was searching for the right word. "You don´t have to stop living", he finally finished, a little bit awkward.

Olivia stared at him. The alcohol in her blood made her head spin.

"What are you talking about?"

Again, he shrugged carelessly. "When have you enjoyed yourself thoroughly the last time? When was the last time you spent your weekend just sitting at home, watching reruns? When was the last time you went shopping just for the sake of it?"

"I…" Her tongue felt heavy. To buy herself some time, she finished her drink as well and placed her glass next to Peter´s on the counter. At her gesture, the bar tender approached and filled both glasses with golden liquid.

"When?", Peter pressed her further. She threw him a disgusted look.

"I went to the amusement park with Ella last month." She couldn´t believe she actually had to think to remember the last time she had seen her niece.

"That was because Rachel wanted you to babysit Ella. And anyway, you got called away after half the day and Ella spent her afternoon playing with Walter´s cow."

"I… I went home early two weeks ago."

He laughed. "Are you already getting desperate?"

"I hate when you do that."

"Do what? Worry about you? Point out the truth? Tell you to slow down?"

"Whatever. It´s still my life. Stop bothering about it."

"I just told you you are worrying too much. You´re way too involved. But they are just cases, Liv, you don´t have to…"

"You have to stop doing that." She was getting angry. Peter simply cocked an eyebrow.

"Do what? Clarify, please."

"You have to stop telling me how I should live my life. What I should do. How I should react. I hate it."

She drained her drink. Under Peter´s unwavering stare, she was getting irritated. She felt frustration stir within her. She was trying – trying so hard to solve the riddle the Pattern posed to them, to stop people from getting hurt, to try and save the world. Her job was growing more difficult every day and she was growing more wary every day as well, knowing there would be no end to the nightmares she would wake to, no way to stop those things she saw in her dreams from happening. Peter had to have those nightmares, too. But he didn´t seem half as much perturbed as by what he saw every day than she felt. His calmness and plain irony with which he accepted everything was making her get increasingly annoyed with him. Strangely, she felt her heart flutter when he smiled at her after they argued. The smile lit up his features, not the sarcastic grin he had worn so often but a true, genuine smile. This was a new discovery. When had it started? She couldn´t remember. She knew this feeling, had experienced it before. But she knew what it was like to give in to such feelings, too. She wouldn´t make the same mistake twice.

"Someone has to tell you", Peter went on, seemingly unaffected by the anger she tried to project into her voice. "I´m not the only one worrying, you know. Astrid has been worrying for a long time now. And Walter… well, even he noticed. And that means a lot, you know that."

Did he really think she was drunk enough for him to get away with this? After their years of teamwork, he – of all people – should be able to remember the amount of alcohol it took to knock her out. _Especially_, she remembered with a pang of embarrassment, _after what I did on Christmas, he ought to know._

"So you just came here to tell me I should retire", she asked, her voice thickly layered with irony. He shook his head in an almost desperate gesture.  
"Nobody wants you to retire, Liv. We just want you to take care of yourself. And…" He hesitated and she felt a bitter taste rise in her mouth. She could see what he was getting at. "You´re not alone in this, I told you already. You cannot go on blaming yourself and nobody else for every case the Pattern bombards us with. You´re not at fault, you cannot stop all these murders and experiments. It is not your fault at all. You know that, don´t you?"

The look on her face spoke plainly of what she thought. He sighted.

"I knew it. You´re still blaming yourself for everything we couldn´t get right. You are aware of the fact that you´re not the only one who made mistakes, right? You didn´t get abducted by a twelve-year-old kid. You didn´t infect with a virus. You didn´t try to kill your friends."

"_You_ didn´t have to kill your own partner. _You_ didn´t let a criminal get away by blackmailing you. _You_ didn´t fail to nail the people responsible for all this mess. _You_ weren´t unable to keep your partner away from a dangerous virus. _You_ are not the gate keeper, responsible for global salvation of some sorts. No, y_ou_ fled responsibility from the moment you became an adult. _You only agreed to stay because I blackmailed you into cooperation._"

He looked seriously hurt. "I´m still here. I didn´t run."

"But you wish you had", she replied, looking at the empty glass in her hands and trying hard to hold back tears. She wouldn´t cry.

"You stayed because you developed a mad feeling of responsibility at some point and you can´t leave because some part of your horribly intelligent brain tells you there´s still a riddle you want to solve, otherwise you wouldn´t be able to sleep. Admit it."

He didn´t admit.

He didn´t speak at all.

She waited, her breath held, hoping she had hurt him earnestly. She wanted to hurt him, she wanted her words to sting, because she didn´t want to drag him down all the way she already had gone. It didn´t seem fair. He had been the first one to stand up for her, he had covered her back a thousand times, he had always been there and his tireless attention had gotten to her. And that was wrong. She would take him down with her and though he seemed dark and mysterious, her personal hell was way too dark for him to stay in. He was a good person. She had known the moment she had set her eyes on him. No matter how much he wanted to run, in the end, he stayed. He was loyal, if not to the FBI, then at least to her and her cause. He had fought his own demons over and over again in order to stay near her, and the least she could do was not do make him follow her on her path.

"Now you´re doing it again", he told her quietly. "You´re trying to push me away."

"I´m not", she lied, her face straight. It took an immense effort. "You say I`m lying because you want it to be a lie."

"You´re lying and you know it. You just don´t want me to go."

"Are you crazy? You´ve been trouble all the way. You´re annoying and embarrassing and you never listen to what I say. I`d be far better off without you."

His eyes betrayed his cool façade – hurt showed in his eyes. She was glad even though it hurt. "You´re trying to destroy yourself, Olivia. You don´t want me to leave because you need me. Nevertheless, you tell me to go."

"I don´t need you!" She felt desperate enough to fake anger. "Why should I need someone like you? I´ve been okay all the way! Why should it have changed since you came barging into my life, trying to tell me what to do and what not to do?"

When he didn´t answer and just stared at her, she sighted and turned to the counter. A few bills were carelessly flung onto it. "This is useless", she said and refused to look at him. "We´re talking in circles. I´m leaving now."

"So you´re refusing to admit you are a human being as well?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" She stiffened. There was something in his voice she couldn´t quite place. He met her glance squarely.

"You refuse to admit you´re a human being. Because humans make mistakes, too, they have faults and needs and stuff like that. And they need a break now and then."

She laughed. It was a bitter laugh. "Remember it was your father who made me what I am. And if it´s that what makes a human being a human being, I guess there´s something even more wrong with me than I imagined."

Grabbing her purse, she left for the door. A hand grabbed her arm. Peter took hold of her and spun her around, forcing her to face him. His eyes, blazing like tinder, bore into hers.

"So you´re saying you´re not human?"

"If you put it like that – I guess I`m not."

His lips suddenly pressed to hers.

Hot and surprisingly gentle and, at the same time, fierce. She was so surprised she couldn´t move. Then she closed her eyes as her body automatically started to respond. Feeling him so close, suddenly realizing what it was they were doing, Olivia shrank back, shocked to the core. _How could he dare…_ Staring at him, she whispered:

"What was that supposed to be?"

He smiled at her grimly. "I´m just proving the point."

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_A/N YOu see? Exactly the end I imagined! *laughs* Well, I wouldn´t say it was an ending, but it surely was a fine last statement. We´ll see where we get from here!_

_So... Thanks a lot for reading! If you have some time, tell me how you liked it. I´d be glad.  
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